Alone In The Dark
by Charlie.E.Brown
Summary: Rachel's life takes a dark turn WARNING: CONTAINS SELF-HARM AND SUICIDE
1. Chapter 1

Alone in the dark

(Disclaimer: I don't own glee)

Chapter 1

**Ok so this is my new glee story it's sad quite a lot of the time beware! In the story it's set a bit after the season 2 finchel break-up but some stuff has happened so i will tell you the details otherwise you would end up getting very confused:**

**Finn and Quinn are dating :(**

**Kurt moved schools :( :(**

**One of Rachel's dad's (Hiram) left :( :( :(**

Rachel walked into WMHS she had changed a lot over the last few months but no one had noticed, her fashion style had changed considerably her animal sweaters turned into long sleeved shirts in black, dark purple, dark red and dark grey paired with the same black torn up jacket, her short plaid skirts turned into long black ripped up jeans, and her mary-janes turned into black heeled leather boots. Her hair had changed too her long dark curly hair now had red streaks in it the same with her makeup Rachel was always completely natural with her makeup but now she had begun using lots of eyeliner and mascara and dark red lipstick.

Her grades had fallen considerably aswell and she didn't sing much in glee club anymore. She didn't have any real friends anymore it seemed that everytime she walked into a room she was greeted with glares and insults. She walked down the hallway and felt herself being pushed into the lockers by a bunch of passing hockey players as she fell to the ground all her books fell out of her bag and she heard muffled laughter from behind her, she turned around to see Mercedes, Quinn and Santana trying to cover their laughs by putting their hands over their mouths. She quickly grabbed all of her stuff and walked down the hall.

Rachel sat on the floor in the girls bathroom she let out another sob as her body shook she reached into her pocket and pulled out a small blade. She raised it up to her arm and cut into her wrist feeling the blood start to drip down from the cut, she did this another 8 times before she decided to clean herself up as glee was starting soon. She washed her arm even though it stung terribly and wrapped it up lightly in bandages, she looked up into the mirror and noticed that she looked pale and withdrawn so she pulled out the container of painkillers in her pocket and put two of them in her mouth and then left the bathroom. She walked into glee club and heard a few groans "Rachel i think we all would appreciate if you could try to be here on time" snapped Mr Schue "Whatever" mumbled Rachel sitting down away from everyone else "Okay today's task is to sing a song about what you are feeling right now. Who's first?" asked Mr Schue "I want to" said Quinn smirking. She got up and stood next to the piano teeling Brad what song she wanted "This is dedicated to **my** boyfriend Finn" said Quinn putting a lot of emphasis on the 'my'.

(QUINN SINGS LOVE STORY)

When Quinn finished her song everyone applauded and she sat down giving Finn a kiss "who's next? Rachel what about you? You haven't sung for a while" asked Mr Schue "Hallelujah" said Santana causing everyone to laugh even Mr Schue had a small smile on his face "No thanks i don't have anything i want to sing" mumbled Rachel "Okay then well who's next?" asked Mr Schue.

Glee club had finished and Rachel left as fast as she could when she realised she had left a book in the choir room she turned around to go and get it when she heard a conversation in the room "Do any of you know what's going on with Rachel?" asked Mr Schue "Nothing's going on with her she's just being an attention whore" said Quinn "I think she's just realising that no one will ever like her i mean not even her dad loved her enough to stay so what hope does she have? She's an ugly big nosed badly dressed freak who is unloved by all who are near her" said Santana. Rachel quickly ran into the choir room, grabbed her book and left when she left the room she heard muffled laughter and ran faster until she reached the auditorium.

Finn decided that enough was enough and walked after Rachel he looked for her everywhere but she was no where to be found until he passed the auditorium and heard singing

_**I feel so alone  
I feel so cold  
I wan't to fly  
Take off to the sky  
It's so cold  
It's so cold  
It's so cold**_

There was a chill  
There was a sound  
There was a whisper  
That I found  
It went along  
Searching  
It will return while I stay

I feel so alone  
I feel so cold  
I wan't to fly  
Take off to the sky  
It's so cold  
It's so cold  
It's so cold

There was a chill  
There was a sound  
There was a whisper  
That I found  
It went along  
Searching  
It will return while I stay

There was a chill  
There was a sound  
There was a whisper  
That I found  
It went along  
Wandering  
It will return while I stay  
Searching

There was a chill  
There was a sound  
There was a whisper  
That I found  
It went along  
Searching  
It will return while I stay

_**There was a chill  
There was a sound  
There was a whisper  
That I found  
It went along  
Wandering  
It will return while I stay  
Searching**_

He walked in and saw Rachel singing with tearms streaming down her face "Rachel?" called Finn "Finn? what...why..uh i have to go" said Rachel running off the stage.

**THAT'S CHAPTER 1 REVIEWS PLEASE!000**


	2. Chapter 2

Alone in the Dark

(I don't own Glee)

Chapter 2

(Rachel's POV)

I sat on the bed going through the scrapbook i had made, it had a picture of the glee club at every competiton or show and i turned to a page that was covered in hearts and stars and ribbons and right in the middle there was a picture of the whole glee club together. A tear fell from my eye and landed onto the page, my dad took this a few weeks after regionals last year i could see Finn standing next to me with his arms around me since we had just started dating before this picture was taken and now...now he was dating Quinn again. How could everything go so wrong? I thought i was okay with the insults and comments i was different and people didnt like that but i never cared but this was different i didn't know how much longer i could live like this. I took the bottle of vodka from my beside table and took a long gulp ignoring the burning in my throat as the liquid went down, i took the razor from my desk and rolled up my jeans to my hip and cut into my hip hissing when the blade went through. I dragged the razor across my hip making a long cut that blood quickly flowed from and then i made a few more before washing the blood off and placing a bandage on the cuts. I curled up into my bed and silently sobbed myself to sleep.

(Finn's POV)

I was worried about Rachel she looked so broken yesterday when she sang and i had to check if she was okay, I saw her staring into her locker and i walked up to her "hey Rach..." i said "It's Rachel Finn not Rach Rachel i don't want you calling me that anymore" said Rachel not looking at me "look we need to talk about yesterday i think you need to talk to someone" i said placing a hand on her shoulder but she immediately shrugged it off "leave me alone Finn" snapped Rachel closing her locker and walking off but i ran after her. "Rachel i'm so sorry that you heard that yesterday" I said "Why? It's not like it's not true and besides i get it everyday i don't think it's going to change anytime soon" said Rachel turning toward me, thats when i noticed the dark rings under her eyes and how pale she looked "You haven't been sleeping have you?" i asked already knowing the answer. "why do you even care? go and makeout with Quinn and leave me alone" snapped Rachel storming off.

(Rachel's POV)

I was washing my face in the girls bathrroms when i heard a loud bang and I saw Quinn storm in "Who the hell do you think you are?" yelled Quinn "Excuse me?" i asked annoyed "I know you've been talking to Finn stay away from him he's mine!" snapped Quinn "Oh my god Quinn SHUT UP! I'm not after your boyfriend one because he's a hypocritical jerk and two mainly because the universe doesn't revolve around you so just piss off!" i yelled. Quinn glared at me for a few seconds and then she stomped out slamming the door behind her, I stared at the door for a few minutes and left the bathroom and went to the choir room for glee club.

(Rachel's Pov)

I walked into the choir room and i heard a few snide remarks and a couple of groans but i was used to that so i just went and sat down as far away as i could from everyone. A couple of minutes later i noticed Finn and Quinn walking in hand in hand, I could feel Finn staring at me but i was relieved when he went and sat with the rest of them. Mr Schue walked in and gave me a look i didn't understand and then he went and placed his bag on the piano "alright guys who wants to sing?" he asked glancing at me. The room was silent and not a single person "Rachel? What about you?" he suggested "No thanks" i said blankly "I'm not asking Rachel no one put their hand up so i'm going to have to start picking, so come on up" said Mr Schue gesturing to the piano "I can't...I...I don't have anything prepared" i said nervously "Come on Rachel there must be some song you can think of" said Mr Schue impatiently "I really don't have anything Mr Schue" i said hoping he would drop it and go to someone else "I'm really dissapointed in you Rachel I thought glee was something enjoyed" said Mr Schue. Before i could stop myself I stood up knocking the chair over "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! YOU THINK I ENJOY THIS? I USED TO ENJOY COMING HERE THIS USED TO BE THE BEST PART OF MY DAY BUT YOU ALL RUINED IT FOR ME!...I...I thought we were supposed to be like a family, what kind of family hurts eachother purposely and turns their back on you when you need them most? My life fell apart and you guys didn't just stand there and watch...you smashed the already broken pieces as well. I am human you know, i may be selfish and annoying but i can still feel and you know what i'm over it i'm tired of this so I quit...i'm done i hope you're happy" i yelled and sobbed. Feeling the tears pour down my cheeks i quickly wiped my face, grabbed my bag and ran out of the room.

I sat down on my bed and began to write a note for whoever would find me,

_Whoever is reading this,_

_I am sorry for what i am about to do but i feel as if there is no other option there is nothing left for me now and i can't handle this anymore. I miss the old me , i miss who i was before this, i miss being happy and singing my precious broadway songs, i miss glee and how it used to make me feel; like i was worth something, i miss Finn even though he's moved on, i miss my daddy but at the same time i never want to see him again and most of all i miss the light because i feel like i'm always in the dark. I wish there was another way._

_Rachel _

I put the letter in an envelope and placed it on my bed and then grabbed the pill box from my desk; i took six of the painkillers and downed it with a couple of swigs of vodka. I slowly got up and went to the bathroom and tunred on the taps running a bath, when it finished it got in despite that i was sill in all of my clothes and i pulled up the sleeve of my shirt and took the razor from the side of the bath. I slowly cut deeply across my wrist ignoring the pain and the huge amount of blood that flowed from the cut and i did it over and over again on both arms, there were about 30 cuts altogether. My head began to feel dizzy and my vision started to blur but i wasn't sure if that was from the pills or the blood loss and slowly my eyes began to drop shut and my hands dropped the razor, it made a clattering sound when it hit the bathroom tiles. I heard loud footsteps and a door crashing open and then there was someone yelling my name but i was overcome by darkness.

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	3. Chapter 3

Alone in The Dark

Chapter 3

(i don't own glee)

(Finn's POV)

I was in the hospital waiting for any news on Rachel, after she had run out i went to her house to check on her and i found her in the bathtub covered in blood. I had to watch the paramedics shock her back to life and her heart actually stopped 3 times on the way to the hospital. I now had to call Kurt and let him know what was going on and i was dreading it but i knew that i had no choice "Hello?" answered Kurt "Uh hi Kurt it's me" i said nervously "Hey Finn what's up?" asked Kurt "Uh listen Kurt i have to tell you something" i said "Okay...is everything alright?" "Look...I'm at the hospital" "What?! Oh my god are you okay?" "I'm fine...it's not me it's...it's Rachel" "What? What happened? Is she okay?" "Not really Kurt...she tried to...kill herself". I heard Kurt gasp and the phone fall to the ground "Kurt? Kurt?" i asked confused I heard fumbling and then Kurt was back on the phone "What hospital are you at?" asked Kurt blankly "Uh Lima Community Hospital" i answered "I'll be there as soon as i can" said Kurt and then he hung up.

(Rachel's POV)

It was warm, that's the first thing i noticed then i heard beeping and my whole body felt stiff. I opened my eyes for a second but quickly shut them again when i was greeted by a blinding light, I let out a groan and tried to rub my eyes when i realised that something was holding them down. "Rachel?" i heard a voice ask i opened my eyes slightly and turned my head to see Kurt "Kurt?...what's going on?Where am I?" i asked "Honey you're in the hospital do you remember what happened?" asked Kurt hesitantly. I realised what had happened my plan had failed and now they had another thing to torture me about "yeah...I remember" i said and I saw the sad look on his face "Kurt why are my arms strapped down?" i asked "It's for your protection sweetie and to make things easier" said Kurt "What are you talking about?" i asked confused as to what he was talking about. "Rach...look the doctors want you to stay here for a little while just till you get better" said Kurt soothingly "What? No! No i won't you can't make me!" i yelled pulling at my restraints "Rachel calm down i'm sorry but this is for your own good they're going to help you" said Kurt but I wasn't listening. I began hyperventilating and I pulled harder against my restraints, tears streamed down my face and I found it difficult to breathe. The next thing i knew a doctor and a couple of nurses barged in I realised that Kurt must have got them, the doctor brought up a needle while the nurses tried to stop me struggling. "NO! Kurt don't let them do this please! Please just let me die! Can't you see that i just want to die!" i screamed to no avail. I began to feel drowsy and I began to lose the fight in me "Kurt...no please...I...I don't want to live...please" i sobbed before sleep took over.

(Finn's POV)

I saw Kurt walk out of Rachel's room and i immediately went up to him "how is she?" i asked anxiously "she's bad I had to get her sedated" said Kurt sitting down in a chair and placing his head in his hands, I went and sat down next to him and put a hand on his shoulder "How did she get this bad?" asked Kurt suddenly. I felt my heart stop as he looked up at me with red eyes "I knew she was feeling down about her dad but i never thought she would do this...what did you guys do to her?" snapped Kurt "I'm not stupid Finn even when she's sad she's still always had glee so for her to try and end her life something must have happened in glee. What was it?" asked Kurt, "Rachel hasn't been herself lately, she barely sings in glee and she doesn't really have any good friends plus there's me and her breaking up" i said after a few moments of silence. "And you thought that was normal? Why didn't you do anything?" yelled Kurt "I tried she just pushed me away and she's not my responsibility Kurt we broke up after she CHEATED on me" i said "are you fucking kidding me? You're really going to bring that up now? At least she was honest with you Finn instead of lying and hiding it from you like _some_ people" shouted Kurt drawing attention to us. "This has nothing to do with Quinn" i mumbled "It has everything to do with Quinn! She cheated on you with your best friend, got pregnant and then told you it was yours and yet you were still able to forgive her but you couldn't forgive Rachel? Do you know how much that hurt her?" yelled Kurt "That doesn't make what she did right" i said "I know that Finn and i get it i really do but she's one of my best friends and if she doesn't make it through this then i don't think we can be friends anymore" said Kurt. We heard voices shouting and we saw Mr Schue and the glee club coming into the waiting room "What are you guys doing here?" i asked horrified of what Kurt would do to them "We heard what happened" said Artie wheeling over to us "How is she?" asked Mr Schue "What's it to you?" snapped Kurt "Kurt? Are you okay?" asked Mercedes coming towards him to hug him but Kurt pushed her away. "Don't touch me" snapped Kurt glaring at everyone "Kurt? I don't understand whats going on?" asked Mercedes approaching him again "I said DON'T TOUCH ME!" he yelled standing up abruptly "Kurt i don't understand" said Tina "What don't you get? I don't want to see you ANY of you so leave" yelled Kurt. Mr Schue approached him cautiously "Kurt what are you talking about? We're a family we don't talk to each other like this" he said and Kurt laughed "Are you kidding me? We're a family? What kind of sick family is this? We lie and cheat and hurt each other intentionally, What kind of family does that? She needed you guys and you hurt her even more, YOU'RE THE REASON SHE'S IN THERE!" yelled Kurt pointing to the door. Tina started to cry and Mike immediately went to comfort her "Oh please this is probably just another one of her schemes to get attention" sneered Quinn "Are you really that fucking blonde? She almost died Quinn she almost DIED because of you guys" snapped Kurt. Mr Schue came closer to Kurt and tried to pat him on the shoulder but Kurt flinched away from him "And you Mr Schue? You're one of the worst because you talk about treating people with kindness and love and yet you let Rachel be taunted everyday. I used to look up to you and now...now i can't barely stand to be in the same room as you" sobbed Kurt sitting down again. My eyes started to tear up and before i knew it I was walking out of the room.

(Next Day Finn's POV)

I knew that at some point i would have to see Rachel so i tried to mentally prepare myself as i opened the door to her room and walked in. Rachel was lying in a hospital bed sleeping, her arms were bandaged up and she had an IV in her hand; what scared me the most was how pale and worn out she looked and the huge obvious dark rings under her eyes. I sat down and took her hand that didn't have the IV in it and i could feel my eyes tear up "Shit Rachel I am so sorry I never wanted you to get hurt, I never wanted for this to happen to you. To know that I am partially responsible for this makes me sick, the truth is that the only reason i could forgive Quinn and not you was because i never loved Quinn we were only together for popularity and now we're together again and to be honest i have no idea why. To be honest i've never stopped loving you so you have to be alright Rachel cause if your not i'll never forgive myself" i cried letting the tears fall.

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	4. Chapter 4

Alone In The Dark

Chapter 4

(I don't own glee)

(Rachel's POV)

Today was the day, it had been 2 weeks and four days since my suicide attempt and they had finally deemed me okay to go home and back to school...as long as i took my pills. I stared into my palm at the 3 little round white pills that would supposedly make me feel better, not that i believed that. Unfortunately i didn't have a choice seeing as I was never left alone now with Kurt watching almost my every move. And if it wasn't Kurt it was Finn, I don't understand why he's here i mean it must annoy the crap out of Quinn and cause troble between them and as much as i hated Quinn i didn't want to ruin Finn's relationship. I heard the door open and Kurt came in with a bag "You ready to go?" he asked "Yep let's get out of here" i said walking out the door.

We were back at my place Kurt had wanted me to stay with him for a while but i managed to convince him that i had to be here for my dad because he needed me. Dad didn't visit me in the hospital I mean he came in to sign forms and paperwork but he never actually came to see me. I didn't really know why but i figured that my suicide attempt must have shocked him especially so soon after Daddy leaving. I was back in my room grateful that i could sleep in my own bed for once. Tomorrow would be my first day back to school which i was suprisingly calm about I had nothing to say to them if they were uncomfortable being around me they had no one to blame but themselves. "Are you okay Rachel?" i heard Kurt ask snapping me out of my thoughts "Uh...yeah i'm fine i'm just thinking" i mumbled "about school?" asked Kurt as if he had read my mind "Yeah i mean i'm not nervous it's just everything's going to be so awkward" i said "Hey if you want i can stay over tonight" suggested Kurt. "No Kurt i'm fine really i need some alone time and i promise I'll call you in the morning" i said trying to reassure him "Okay...if you say so i'll be here to pick you up at eight" said Kurt giving me a quick hug and then leaving. I let out a huge sigh got into my pyjamas and tried to get some sleep.

I woke up early in the morning not because i was nervous because i had rolled onto my stomach and accidently bashed one of my wrists against a drawer while i was asleep. One of the healing cuts had reopened and i had to change my bandages, I stared down at my myself my bandages made my arms look bulky underneath the long sleeved shirt i had on. Kurt had picked me up on the way to school but only after he checked to see if i had taken my pills. We walked into school with many eyes focusing on me "Wow I used to wish that everyone would give me attention careful what you wish for" i said with sarcasm. "It'll stop soon honey just ignore it" said Kurt, "yeah easier said than done, by the way I know that you want to follow me around all day but we don't have school together" I pointed out "Oh don't worry when i'm not there Finn will be" said Kurt with a smile "Oh...great but what about PE i don't have either of you in that class the only person i know there is...Quinn" i said cringing "Don't worry she wouldn't dare try to do anything not unless she wants to answer to me...Honey look i have to go to school now but Finn will be here in a sec okay i'll call you later" said Kurt hugging me and then walking off. Thankful for the solitude that i rarely had anymore i went straight to my locker and got out the books i needed and made my way to roll call when i heard "Rachel? Hey wait up i'm supposed to go with you" Finn yelled from the end of the corridor. I tried to speed up but unfortuantely Finn is a fast runner and he quickly caught up to me "Hey Rach how are you?" he asked casually "I'm fine Finn please stop asking me that" I said still walking "Rachel hold on a second" said Finn grabbing my arm. I felt pain shoot through my forearm and let out a yelp of pain "Oh shit Rachel i'm sorry! Are you o-" "Don't say it" i said cutting him off 'Okay i'm sorry bad habit" apologized Finn "No Finn i'm sorry you were just trying to look out for me I'm just in a bad mood i didn't get a lot of sleep and really i'm fine I think one of the cuts just reopened again" i said checking my bandaged arm which yes was now stained with blood. "Oh god i'm sorry come on i'll take you to the nurse" panicked Finn seeing the blood "No it's fine I brought stuff with me" I said trying to open my bag with my good arm "Here let me help" said Finn taking the bag from me and guiding me to the girls bathroom.

I sat down next to the sink while Finn wiped the blood off my arm and wrapped the new bandages around it "Thank you" I said while he threw away the bloodied bandages "No problem" he said giving me a small smile. There was a few awkward moments before Finn broke the silence "are you coming to glee today?" he asked "Uh...Finn i don't know" I mumbled "I'm sorry I shouldn't have" Finn said "No it's okay It's just I don't know if i can face their stares and questions" I said looking away. I felt arms wrap around me and I realised that Finn was hugging me "I'm sorry this happened to you Rachel. If it makes you feel any better if anyone says anything to you I'll have your back, I promise this isn't going to be like last time" he said. I pulled away and that's when i realised I was crying, I quickly wiped away the tears "I'm sorry I don't know why I'm crying" I sniffed "It's fine...so are you going to see Ms Pillsbury?" asked Finn "Uh..yeah i'm actually supposed to see her in about twenty minutes" i said standing up "Oh well i'll walk you there" said Finn leaving the bathroom with me.

I walked into glee with Finn by my side well I pretty much hid behind Finn as we walked in, I heard a few whispers and i could feel their stares burning into my back but Finn reassured me by putting an arm around my shoulder and saying "Just ignore it", we sat down and i kept my eyes on the floor until Mr Schue came in. "Rachel...you're back" he said awkwardly, i just stared at him silently until he put his bag on the piano "Uh okay guys...who wants to go first?" asked Mr Schue "we'll go" said Mercedes getting up with Tina, Artie and Puck.

_Everybody needs a little time away, _

_I heard her say,_

_From each other._

_Even lovers need a holiday,_

_Far away from each other._

_Hold me now,_

_It's hard for me to say I'm sorry,_

_I just want you to stay..._

_After all that we've been through,_

_I will make it up to you,_

_I promise to._

_And after all that's been said and done,_

_You're just the part of me I can't let go._

_Couldn't stand to be kept away,_

_Just for the day,_

_From your body_

_Wouldn't want to be swept away,_

_Far away from the one that I love._

_Hold me now,_

_It's hard for me to say I'm sorry,_

_I just want you to know..._

_Hold me now, _

_I really want to tell you I'm sorry,_

_I could never let you go._

_After all that we've been through,_

_I will make it up to you,_

_I promise to._

_And after all that's been said and done,_

_You're just the part of me I can't let go._

_And after all that we've been through,_

_I will make it up to you,_

_I promise to._

I felt my eyes water up and I couldn't take it anymore so I bolted out of the room crying.

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	5. Chapter 5

Alone In The Dark

Chapter 5

(I don't own glee)

(Finn's POV)

I watched Rachel run out of the room in tears and quickly turned to everyone "How could you ambush her like that? It's her first day back don't you think she's freaked out enough" i said before running after Rachel. I looked down the corridors but i couldn't see or hear her anywhere, 'crap she's a fast runner when she wants to be' i thought before going to look for her. I had to look for ten minutes before i found her, she was hiding in one of the janitor closets but i could still hear her muffled sobs. I opened the door and sat down next to her on the floor "Hey Rach it's ok" i whispered as I felt her put her head on my shoulder "I'm sorry Finn it was too much and I felt like I was suffocating" sobbed Rachel 'It's fine Rachel stop apologizing they should have known better" i said putting an arm around her shoulder. Rachel looked up at me with her red tear filled eyes "They probably think i'm even more of a freak now" she mumbled wiping her eyes "Hey you're not a freak okay don't say that" I said "But I am, I'm not pretty or funny or nice i'm not worth it i mean even my dad left and now the other one won't talk to me and I feel like everything's falling apart" she cried. I immediately took her into my arms "Never say that you are beautiful Rachel and you are nice okay and if your dad doesn't see that well then he's an idiot" i said trying to make her see how perfect she was. I heard Rachel make a watery laugh "Rachel are things really that badly at home?" i asked concerned for her well being "He doesn't even look at me Finn he hasn't said a word to me and he goes into his room every night and never comes out" she said shakily. The look on her face reminded me of before she tried to kill herself and that freaked me out so I took her head into my hands "Rachel you're not going to...try _that _again?" i asked scared of what her answer would be "I...I don't know Finn" she sobbed "What do you mean?" i asked terrified "There's days where I think I could be okay and I wouldn't think about ending my life but then there are days where everything seems to go wrong and all the depression just swallows me...those days I wonder if anything is really worth the pain" she said with the tears streaming faster. It frightened me to hear her say that.

(Rachel's POV)

While I was crying I felt him push my chin up so I looked him straight into the eyes "Rachel...promise me that if you ever feel like that you'll call me I don't care what time it is just call me and I'll be there in a second" he pleaded "Okay Finn" i promised even though deep down I knew that i would break that promise, Finn stood up and held out a hand "Come on let's get out of here" he said helping me up. We walked out of the school and towards Finn's truck and got in, he drove to my house in silence and turned the car off "So you going to prom?" he asked me breaking the silence "Oh right prom's next week...Uh I'm not sure if I'm going i don't have a dress yet and I would be going by myself" I said "Please come it'll be fun and you can hang around with me if you want" he suggested. I let out a sarcastic laugh "Oh yeah I'm sure Quinn will love that" I remarked "she'll probably be off trying to get more votes for prom queen so she won't even be with us for most of it" he said trying to convince me . "I don't know Finn the glee club will be there" i said "Just stay with me and it'll be fine" he said "Fine I'll come but if something happens I am out of there" I said.

(NEXT WEEK)

I stared at my reflection in my mirror, my dress was purple on the bottom it had spagetti straps and the top was purple and it had black lace over it. It was floor length and the top was tight but the bottom went out. I had my red hair streaks dyed purple and my hair was down and curled, I had black eyeshadow and mascara on and my lips were a dark red. My heels were black and had purple glitter on them, I had a black droplet necklace on with a purple jewel and earrings that matched. My biggest problem was my scars I didn't have to wear my bandages anymre but the scars weren't fully healed yet they were still a bit red, I was going to wear long gloves over my arms but they didn't go with my dress so I chose to just leave my arms bare. I looked at the clock in my room and realised that it was time for me to go and meet Finn at the prom.

I walked into the school hall and there was silver and black balloons everywhere I could see some of the glee club up on the stage performing because glee club was doing some of the music for prom. Right now Santana was up there singing 'You and I' and later on I was up no one knew about this but me and Mr Schue and I wanted it to be a suprise. "Rachel?" I heard Finn say behind me, I turned around and saw Finn in a black tux "Wow Finn you look handsome" I said "You look amazing Rachel" said Finn "Thanks" i said. "So where's Quinn?" I asked " Oh she's over there trying to get more votes" said Finn rolling his eyes and pointing to where the voting boxes were, I could see Quinn talking to a few people. She wore a light pink dress that was strapless and tight around the top but the skirt went out and was made of tutu like material, the top was covered in little crystals which were spread across the skirt. Her hair was up in a elegant bun which looked like it was designed to have a crown placed on it which I thought was a bit arrogant. I rolled my eyes and turned back to Finn "So what do think of prom?" asked Finn "It's okay I guess but I'd still rather be at home" I admitted "Well I am determined to change that by the end of tonight" said Finn. "Dance with me" said Finn taking my hand and dragging me to the dancefloor. Once we were there the song was changed by the DJ and 'Never Let Me Go' by Florence and the Machine came on. All the couples around us started to slow dance so I turned around and was about to walk off when I felt Finn grab my hand "Where are you going? I thought we were going to dance" he said "Oh...I uh...it's just that...never mind" i trailed off. Finn placed his hand on my waist and I put a hand on his shoulder while our other hands entwined and we swayed to the music. When the song was about to end I looked at him and he pressed his lips against mine lightly "What the hell is going on here?" I heard a shrill voice shriek. I quickly pulled away from Finn away from his lips and him, meanwhile Quinn was standing there fuming "Well?" She asked "It was nothing Quinn I doubt he meant to do it he probably just got caught up in the moment" I said running off. I pushed through the crowds and towards the girls bathroom ignoring Finn's voice calling my name.

_**The storm is coming**_

_**But I don't mind**_

_**People are dying**_

_**I close my blinds**_

_**All that I know is I'm breathing now**_

_**I want to change the world**_

_**Instead I sleep**_

_**I want to believe in more than you and me**_

_**But all that I know is I'm breathing**_

_**All i can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**Now**_

_**Now**_

_**Now **_

_**All that I know is I'm breathing**_

_**All i can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**All we can do is keep breathing**_

_**Now**_

I finished my song and walked off the stage "Okay now is the time we've all been waiting for...Time to crown Prom King and Prom Queen!" announced Principal Figgins. I saw Quinn grab Finn's hand and drag him towards the front pushing through the other people. "this year's Prom King is...David Karofsky!" he announced, there was a loud cheer and Karofsky came forward and hadn the crown placed on his head "and now this year's Prom Queen is..."

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	6. Chapter 6

Alone In The Dark

(I don't own glee)

Chapter 6

"...Santana Lopez!" The was a short silence quickly followed by everyone applauding and Santana going up on the stage and have the crown placed on her head. I looked towards where Quinn was and I saw her giving Santana death stares, she turned glared at me and then ran off to the bathroom. I quickly went after her knowing that she was going to be taking this hard, when I walked into the bathroom I found her sobbing by the sinks "Quinn you need to calm down" i said approaching her "This is your fault!" she yelled at me. I wasn't suprised that she was blaming me for this "No one voted for me because they knew that he'd rather be with you!" she snapped "That's not true-" I said but I was cut off by Quinn slapping me across the face. I felt pain shoot across the side of my face and I held my face in my palm "What the fuck?" I gasped looking back up at her only to have her punch me in the face. I felt blood come out of my nose and I held a hand up to my now bleeding nose "How do you like that you bitch?" I heard her taunt. I quickly punched her in the stomach and when she bent over holding her stomach I slapped her across the face. I then walked out of the bathroom leaving Quinn on the floor, unfortunately I ran straight into Mercedes "Hey Rache- What happened to your face?" she gasped seeing the blood "Quinn and I had a little disagreement you may want to tell Finn that his girlfriend is on the bathroom floor" I said pushing past her and out of the hall.

I walked into the house "Dad I'm home" i yelled but as usual got no response, I went up into my bathroom and looked into the mirror. I had a large bruise on the right side of my face and my nose was a bit bloody and bruised. I got a tissue and wiped the blood off my face and went to go find the first aid kit "Dad do you know where the first aid kit is?" I yelled but all I heard was silence "Dad?" I yelled and went to his room. "Dad do you know where th- DAD!" I screamed and I ran towards his body on the floor I saw a knife and a letter next to him and I quickly rolled his body over hoping and praying that what I was thinking hadn't happened. The cuts across his arms and throat were deep and still bleeding and I couldn't help but let out a cry of pain I pulled his head into my lap not caring that I was now getting cvered in blood and sobbed . I got up and phoned the ambulance and waited for them to come, when they finally arrived and put his body on a stretcher I rode with them in the ambulance to the hospital. When we arrived they took him away and I had to wait in the emergency room but I already knew he was gone. After what seemed like eternity the doctor finally came out and the look on his face said everything "I'm sorry we did everything we could but he passed away" said the doctor sadly. I let a few tears out and sat down and put my head in my hands "I'm sorry but I have to ask did he want to be an organ donor?" he said softly "Uh...H..he did" I sobbed "Thank you when you're up to it the police want to talk to you"he said leaving me to grieve. After hours of crying I finally got up and went to the police officers "I'm Rachel Berry they said you wanted to talk to me" i said shakily "ah yes I am so sorry for your loss but we need to talk to you about the letter he left" he said looking at me with pity "Okay" I said giving him a look that said for him to explain "Uh...Inside was a will, it seems that last week your father went to see his laywer and made a few changes" said the police officer "Changes?" i said confused. "Yes he made it so that in the event of his death everything the house, the money everything goes to you. In his will he said it was his goodbye gift" said the police officer "What? Are you serious?" I gasped "Yes and since you are now 18 (In my story she's 18 not 17) you get everything." said the officer. I stood there shocked for a few minutes before he made an awkward shuffle and pulled out a letter from his back pocket "Uh this was also in the envelope...it's for you" he said handing the letter. I stared at the envelope with my name on it before deciding that I would read it later because I already had too much to take in "T...Thanks I'm going to go now" I said shakily before I sprinted out of the hospital.

I opened my door and walked into the dark house which I now owned, I looked around for a few seconds before I collapsed to the floor crying. I shrieked and sobbed and cried as I began to realise that he was gone, I pulled my hair and curled up into the foetal positon and cried until there were no more tears. After a couple of hours I got up and went up into my room, that's when I noticed that I still had my prom dress on which was now slightly covered in dried blood. I ripped the dress off and stepped into my bathroom and turned the shower on, I got in and scrubbed the blood off me until my skin was pink and there was not a hint of blood left. I quickly changed into my old sweats and then I had to run back into the bathroom and throw up violently, I kept retching until my throast ached and there was nothing left to come up. I didn't know what to do so I just lied down on the bathroom floor and began to cry again.

I stayed like this for hours until the littlest ray of sunshine came in through the window and I got up and walked into his room, there was a patch of his blood dried into the carpet so I got a bucket and a cleaning brush and scrubbed until the carpet was back to it's normal colour. I then cleaned the bathroom and put my prom dress in the washing machine but I knew that even if the blood cae off that I would never wear that dress again. I took down every picture with my father in in and placed them all in a drawer which I was determined never to open again and I burst into tears as soon as the drawer shut. I heard the phone ring downstairs and I went to answer it "Hello?" I croaked "Hi honey how was prom?" I heard Kurt ask "Kurt I really don't want to talk about prom ok" I rasped "Rachel? Are you ok?" I heard his concerned voice ask "No" I said my voice cracking "What happened?" Kurt asked "My Dad...he...he..I came home...and..he...knife...there was so much blood...doctor...said...nothing...they...could...do" I sobbed struggling to breathe. I heard Kurt gasp "Rachel i'm coming over now okay" he said and I heard his keys jingiling "What's going on? I heard a voice in the backround say. It was Finn "Kurt please don't tell please I just need you right now please" I sobbed "It's okay I'll be there soon" he said, I heard him mumble an excuse about Blaine to Finn and then I hung up.

"Rachel open the door It's Kurt honey!" I heard him yell I slowly went to the door and opened it, I was quickly tackled by a worried Kurt "Oh Rach I'm so sorry" he said as he hugged me. When he pulled away I saw the shock on his face as he took in my apperance, I knew how I looked I was pale and my eyes were red and bloodshot. I felt th tears start to form again and I fought against them because I didn't want to cry in front of Kurt but I couldn't help but break down, "I'm so sorry Rachel, I wish I could do something to help" said Kurt "he's gone Kurt he's gone and he's never coming back I'm alone" I sobbed "I know Rachel I know but you will get through this I promise" he said while I sobbed into his shoulder. "Kurt...will you help me plan the funeral? there's so much to do but I'm not in the right state of mind to do anything" I whispered "Of course Rachel"he said. "What do you need?Are you hungry? Tired? Anything you need me to do?" asked Kurt pulling away from me "No" I said blankly "Do you want me to call the school tell them that you'll be away for a few days at the least?" asked Kurt "No I don't want to talk to people right now and if you call the school eveeryone will know withtin the hour" I sighed "What about Finn? Do you want me to call Finn?" he asked trying to help "Finn has probably got enough to deal with now I can imagine how angry Quinn is with him" I mumbled "Sweetie they broke up last night after you left he was furious with her for hurting you" said Kurt patting my shoulder. I was shocked "they broke up because of me?" I gasped feeling guilty "No they broke up because she intentionally hurt someone that he cared about" said Kurt. "Look sweetie he's still in love with you he just is too scared to do anything considering how fragile you are and I know that you still love him" said Kurt smirking "You need him right now so I don't care how mad you will be at me I'm calling him" said kurt walking out of the room before I had the chance to argue.

I was in my bedroom curled up on my bed in the foetal position, there were tissues literally everywhere and the whole room was dark not a single light was turned on when Finn came in and sat down next to me on my bed "Hey Rachel" he whispered into my ear I tried so hard not to cry but before I knew it my body was shaking with sobs "I'm sorry Rachel" he whispered while stroking my hair. He lay down next to me and wrapped his arms around me and while I cried he whispered soothing loving things in my ear.

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